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Coping With the Loss of a Canine Companion |
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For many of us, the death of our dog is little different to losing a relative or close friend. For some, their dog is their closest friend. Membership Secretary Penny Gayler has recently been through this trauma and agreed to write this personal account of the steps she took to cope. We hope it may help others to prepare for and come to terms with the inevitable. From the moment we take the new, fluffy bundle of puppy into our home and our hearts we must acknowledge the fact that, in the normal scheme of things, we will outlive it. Sometimes we are able to choose where and when we will say the final “Goodbye”. Sometimes it is beyond our control. However, as the time approaches, you can make certain decisions. Will you bury your pet at home, have them cremated and then bring their ashes home, or do you prefer neither option and leave your pet at the veterinary surgery for them to deal with? Knowing what was to come I had time to make these decisions. Having some control over the situation helped me through. Mulberry, my male Golden Retriever, had been diagnosed with a tumour on his spleen and an enlarged heart (cardiomyopathy), which ruled out any form of operation. The vet had said realistically Mulberry had no more than six months and so we were already on borrowed time as he was passed the six and a half months stage. With the weather turning warm he was beginning to huff and puff a lot more. When he suddenly went lame I wrongly assumed it was his back problem again. I booked an appointment with his McTimoney practitioner, the chiropractors that specialise in animals, and who had worked wonders in the past. As it turned out it was not his back at all, but his foot, which had a cluster of tumours on it and was red raw. He could barely walk and I could not see him suffer. Operating on him was out of the question. His heart would not have stood it and I could not bear for him to spend what could have been his last day in the vets to then have him die on the operating table. With a heavy heart I ‘phoned the vets and asked for one to call, explaining what would be expected. When he arrived he agreed that this was the kindest thing. I have five other dogs. I put them out in my car. We took Mulberry out onto the back lawn and with the sun on his back and my arms around him, the vet gave him an injection that put him to sleep. Once he was laid on the lawn the vet followed it with a further dose that would stop Mulberry’s heart. My husband and I were able to say our goodbyes. Heartbroken as I was I drew comfort from the fact that Mulberry had suffered no stress, no last visit to the vet, no fear of what was to come, but had peacefully “gone to sleep”. My main concern now was my other dogs. I didn’t want them thinking
that Mulberry was “lost” and so we quietly brought them through and
let them see him. They all acknowledged him and went away and lay in
the shade. For the rest of the day they were very quiet, but The vet took Mulberry away and I will have his ashes back, in a wooden box that I can bury under his mulberry tree on the front lawn. Alternatively the ashes can be returned in an unsealed china urn so that you can scatter them instead of burying them. Most of us let the vet make the arrangements, but if you wish you can do so yourself. There are various pet crematoriums and they offer a variety of services including a prepayment plan if cost is a worry to you. There are also counselling services for bereaved owners should they feel the need. One of the best known is run by the animal charity, Blue Cross. You can telephone them on 0800 096 6606, or contact them by email on pbssmail@bluecross.org.uk. There is more information on their website, www.bluecross.org.uk. |
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